night with huge disparity

naah.....night meet day day meet night i'm anxious about u both...how could u maintain your relationship??/hehehehe...that such a stupid one to ask...hehehehe...lately i've been wondering why i keep dragging myself into my past...i can't even imagine it is terrible....now i get my fresh start...new ambition.....go cheese cake!!!!yeah!!!!hate to pronounce that i think i'm short minded...but on the other hand i just pretend to be one.....recover nad be undercover.....my lust is just towards the brains....and insanity.....i love to watch people die...and more lovely i want to make it a fun games....heheheheh...but i can't decide who will die i only can make it lovely...rarely i make decision but today i make one.....i got many problems but i just keep got into new one.....i guess that is me.....i place some part of me into the rage world to make it demonic....but that's what i prefer...good part is everyone is very careful with me but the best part is their carefulness will lead to their fallen.....i never mention what real...i mention what it meant and what people wanna hear.....seems i can't sleep at night and finds my self losing everything......but i never take that as disparity or misfortune....today i heard from her is what decision u make don't regret it....gosh i only regret if i don't be me.....risky things help me live lady...u way far from living hellish-world like me.....i never betray myself and so do u...mistakes i made at my past is just i need to make it to keep me under control......but more or less....i'll never let anyone win against me...!!!!ever!!!!even if i'm in hell that time and you're still breathing i never will.....rather fallen together than losing....u would never understand me like i do understand u......stop talking like u're best.....and...stop pretending like u're like an angel while u just be a bitch.....and throw away that tudung also polite act if u just wear to cover our bitches reality...i don't eat that.....naah......i can't believe i paste myself and write a history part with u for some years of my life....that the mistake that i love to make.....